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《傷心書》(Michael Rosen's Sad Book)

text by Michael Rosen

pictures by Quentin Blake

某個早晨在敦南誠品看到架上擺著一本《傷心書》(Michael Rosen's Sad Book),這是一本講「傷心」(sad)的書,講述他如何面對「傷心」,讀了一遍,我真的覺得很難過,而且說得很貼切,不管是為了什麼而難過。後來回家找資料的時候才知道他寫下這些文字是因為他十八歲的兒子突然過世,讓他難以接受。

打開第一頁,一張明明難過卻要裝笑臉的圖,

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記得有一陣子心情不太好,明明很難過還得裝笑臉,

某個朋友對我說,你為什麼不好好趁著這時候寫下或畫出你的感受?

雖然說很難過,但就好好利用那股「怨氣」吧!

但我並沒有畫出任何圖,因為非常忙碌也非常難過,我只想好好地放空思考對於自己最重要的事情是什麼。

覺得自己花太多時間在不值得的人事物上,其實一直知道自己花太多心力去討好別人,但是這有什麼好呢?講難聽點就是拍馬屁,不敢說真話,雖然現在好像也常常在討好別人,膽子小不敢承擔責任。

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生命消逝,那個形體就消失了,就是不見了,永遠永遠都不可能再摸到、見到或說話聊天,只能努力地將美好的回憶留在腦中。

每翻一次,就會看見那個空掉的位置,生命既脆弱又同時堅強,是一種很奇妙的違和感。

誠心推薦這本書。

 

"Maybe you think I'm being happy in this picture.

Really, I'm being sad but pretending I'm happy.

I'm doing that because I think people won't

like me if I'm being sad."

 

"Sad is a place

that is deep and dark

like the space

underthe bed

 

Sad is a place

that is high and light

like the sky

above my head

 

When it's deep and dark

I don't dare go there

 

When it's deep and dark

I don't dare go there

 

When it's high and light

I want to be thin air.

 

This Last bit means that I don't want to be here.

I just want to disapper."

 

其它相關文章:

Darkness in literature: Sad Book by Michael Rosen/Guardian

Author of the month: Michael Rosen/Guardian

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